I'm Jen Beman, and I invented BioGraffs based on a philosophy of storytelling I developed throughout my career as a documentary editor. I've spent 30 years understanding storytelling, the different ways stories can unfold based on different perspectives in a documentary, and how transformative storytelling can be for the storyteller themselves.
It started with talking about sex. In 2016 I started a monthly women's discussion group because I was interested in helping women share their stories about their relationships and their sexual experiences. I thought I might make a documentary about it.
I invented an activity for that group that involved using cubes to stand for sexual values. It was so successful in my discussion group that I turned it into an interactive art installation called the Graphic Sex Project to help people tell their sexual stories, de-shame talking about sex, and open up new conversations about preferences. At multiple events across the country, I asked people to make a "graph" of a good sexual experience using colored cubes. The installations were a huge success. People could make a graph, or just browse the collection of graphs other people had made at previous installations. It was a featured event around DC & NY, as well as at several Sex Weeks events at Universities across the country.
What I discovered doing these installations was that this quirky way of looking at sexuality was a uniquely powerful way for a person to get a new perspective on their desires, and the graphs they created were a great conversation opener with a partner, sparking deep discussion on a typically difficult topic.
I soon realized that this was actually a very helpful way to think about any difficult topic. That couples could benefit from using this tool to open up tricky conversations, or just have a fun night of in-depth discussion of personal topics. I realized that the BioGraffs method creates the a structure that encourages active listening and the space for couples to really hear each other, expound on their perspective, and communicate better. I also saw how it could be a useful tool for therapists to share with their clients.
I sought input from psychotherapists, psychologists, and counselors on how to make this tool work for people. In 2025 I launched "See What I Mean" as a live workshop to make this powerful method available to more people - including you!