Meaningful Conversations Start with BioGraffs
A Communication Game
Do you ever wish you could see what your partner was thinking? BioGraffs lets you do that. Take time together to map out your feelings, express what’s in your heart, and truly hear each other. It’s more than just talking—It’s about thinking deeply, expressing creatively, and connecting with the people who matter—on a whole new level.
BioGraffs is the Think-it-out, Talk-it-out Toolkit. A fun way to express yourself about things important to you.
Do it with a partner to better understand each other's perspective. Do it on your own for clarity and personal insight.
BioGraffs is 300 colored magnetic wooden cubes and 2 magnetic whiteboards. The 8 storyboard cards guide you creating a graphic visualization of an important aspect of your life that's complicated to talk about. Role cards help you both practice empathetic, active listening. Exclusive online resources help you go deeper in the process.
Share your visual with someone close to you, so you understand each other better.
People Rave About BioGraffs
See How BioGraffs Works
A totally unique way to have a conversation. Think-it-out, then Talk-it-out.
Do you long to be better understood about some aspect of your life?
Do you have a lot going on in your head?
Are you struggling to communicate on difficult topics - maybe with a partner, with a family member or friend, even with your therapist? Some things are so hard to put into words.
What if you had a way to make it easier? What if you could gain clarity, communicate better, feel really understood?
Discover deeper conversations through the power of creative, visual storytelling and active listening.
BioGraffs is an extremely versatile and powerful tool to help you, think things through, communicate on a deeper level, and gain greater connection. Get yours!
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How does BioGraffs help communication?BioGraffs is a unique method that helps couples create visual representations of their thoughts, feelings, and perspectives. First, it gives each person a chance to think through and organize what they want to say. The process of turning complex ideas into a visualization of emotions and perspectives helps to make those easier to share and aids in understanding. The sharing of the creations encourages active listening and curiosity about each others perspective, fostering deeper connections and more productive conversations. And it's fun and playful, so defensiveness is reduced.
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Is this method right for me and my partner?The BioGraff method is a good fit for couples who: ✔ want to be proactive around communication, problem areas, and intimacy. ✔ want to move forward but find it hard to make time and space in their busy lives to talk. ✔ have very different communication styles, but are committed to understanding each other. ✔ like to play games or try new things
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What is Active Listening, and how does BioGraffs support that practice?Active listening is the skill of fully focusing, understanding, and responding to someone during a conversation. Instead of just waiting for your turn to speak, active listening means you’re giving your full attention to the other person—hearing not only their words but also their emotions and intentions behind them. It’s a key component of effective communication and helps create a deeper connection. BioGraffs naturally supports active listening by providing a visual framework for communication. When you or your partner lay out thoughts using the BioGraffs cubes, it gives both of you something tangible to focus on. This makes it easier to listen without interrupting, because you’re not just reacting to words—you’re engaging with the visual representation of someone’s thoughts or feelings. By slowing down the conversation and allowing both parties to see and reflect on each other’s perspectives, BioGraffs creates space for more thoughtful responses and helps prevent misunderstandings. It turns the act of listening into something active, collaborative, and clear.
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Is BioGraffs a game, or is it serious?Both! BioGraffs is a fun way to have a conversation about personal things. Use is a tool to just get to know each other better. You can make BioGraffs like: A Formative Moment in my Past, A Perfect Day, My Strengths, or My Next 10 Years. Use it for date night, or a fun time hanging out with a friend. BioGraffs can feel playful, but it's designed for serious communication too. Think of it as a tool that helps you express complex thoughts and emotions in a visual, hands-on way. While it might feel creative and even fun to use, the goal is to help you have meaningful conversations about things that matter—whether that's resolving conflicts, understanding each other better, or discussing deeper topics in your relationship. So while BioGraffs can definitely lighten the mood, it’s all about facilitating authentic, thoughtful dialogue and connection. It’s both a creative tool and a serious way to improve communication.
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Is BioGraffs good for things we fight about?Absolutely! BioGraffs is designed to help you navigate those tough conversations with clarity and understanding. When emotions are high, it’s easy to misinterpret each other’s words or get stuck in a cycle of frustration or antagonism. BioGraffs gives you a visual way to lay out your thoughts and feelings, so both of you can see the big picture and understand each other's perspectives more clearly. Instead of going back and forth in the heat of the moment, you can use BioGraffs to slow things down, focus on what’s really important, and find common ground. It gives you each a platform to completely share your perspective. It’s a great tool for turning arguments into productive discussions, where both people feel heard and understood. Also, it's playful quality - the colorful blocks, being creative - can tamp down defensiveness or stone-walling. By using BioGraffs, you’re not just talking about the problem—you’re working together to solve it.
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How is this different from other conversational support games, like Esther Perel's "Where Should We Begin"?Very different! "Where Should We Begin" is great and there are literally hundreds of similar things on the market. They are all basically the same: a deck of cards with conversation prompts. Those are fun and can spark great conversation, but they are nothing like BioGraffs. BioGraffs is completely unique. You know what you need to talk about, so you make up your own prompts BioGraff helps you "externalize" something that's been on your mind BioGraffs doesn't center talking as the primary means of responding to the prompt BioGraffs is visually creative to pull more meaning out of your response and thoughtfulness BioGraffs goes into depth on a particular topic of personal meaning to YOU BioGraffs changes the structure of the conversation to focus on one person at a time You can take a picture of the BioGraff you made to return to the conversation later Every BioGraff becomes a springboard for more conversation on the a topic YOU choose
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How do I know what to make my BioGraff about?There's two ways! The first way is to simply think about what's been on your mind or how you've been feeling about something. Is there something you've been thinking about a lot? Make a BioGraff about it. The other way to to browse through the categories on the title-picker, right here on this website. There 15 different life categories and each one has lot of BioGraff-making ideas to inspire you.
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How does a BioGraff represent my feelings?Once you've decided what your BioGraff is about, the next step is to assign meaning to the cubes. What are the parts of this story you are going to tell? When you think of the topic of your BioGraff, what are the thoughts, feelings, events, actions, or ideas that come to mind? Write down a word or two for each and put a colored cube next to each one. Now each part of your story is represented by a different colored cube. Play with the cubes and arrange them in a way that says more about your story. Maybe you arrange them like a timeline, where it shows the order of events or feelings. Maybe you arrange them in a design that shows connections between thoughts and feelings. You can literally play with your thoughts and feelings outside your head!
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Is this for good therapists to use with their clients?Yes! BioGraffs is very effective in a clinical setting either with couples, family, or with individuals. Check out the testimonials for things therapists say about using this method with clients. If you are a therapists, you will want a set for your therapy toolbox! If you are a client, suggest it to your therapist, or bring them a BioGraff you made and talk about it in session. BioGraffs is a totally unique tool to use with your clients, whatever the modality: To help clients who are caught up in their own stories To help people get distance from their story (externalize) To help people talk about hard topics, with you or with a partner To help clients share their life experiences with you To help clients talk about traumatic experiences safely To gain clarity on confusing issues For clients who feel stuck For clients when you are feeling stuck For couples to understand each other better For families that need help hearing each other The BioGraffs method is for any clinician looking for ways to expand their repertoire of approaches, and interested in exploring narrative and storytelling techniques. Externalizing internal narratives affords an opportunity for people to create distance from events and become the protagonist of their own choosing in the stories of their lives. Read more here
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Can I use BioGraffs on my own?Yes, absolutely! BioGraffs is a powerful tool for self-reflection as well as for communication with others. You can use it on your own to think through complex emotions, clarify your thoughts, and visualize your inner story. It’s a great way to get perspective on what you’re feeling or experiencing before you bring it into a conversation with someone else. By arranging the cubes, you can better understand your own thoughts, identify patterns, and even work through personal challenges. Whether you’re using it to gain clarity for yourself or to prepare for a conversation, BioGraffs can be just as effective solo as it is in pairs or groups.
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I've never seen anything like this. Where did it come from?I'm Jen Beman, and I invented BioGraffs based on a philosophy of storytelling I developed through my career as a documentary editor. I've spent 30 years understanding storytelling, and the different ways stories can unfold based on different perspectives in a documentary. Talking about Sex In 2016 I started a monthly women's discussion group because I was interested in helping women share their stories about their relationships and their sexual experiences. I thought I might make a documentary about it. I invented an activity for that group that involved using cubes to stand for sexual values. It was so successful in my discussion group that I turned it into an interactive art installation called the Graphic Sex Project to help people tell their sexual stories, de-shame talking about sex, and open up new conversations about preferences. At multiple events across the country, I asked people to make a "graph" of a good sexual experience using colored cubes. The installations were a huge success. People could make a graph, or just browse the collection of graphs other people had made at previous installations. It was a featured event around the DC areas, as well as at several Sex Weeks events at Universities across the country. What I discovered doing these installations was that this quirky way of looking at sexuality was a uniquely powerful way for a person to get a new perspective on their desires, and the graphs they created were a great conversation opener with a partner, sparking deep discussion on a typically difficult topic. BioGraffs is Born I soon realized that this was actually a very helpful way to think about any difficult topic. That couples could benefit from using this tool to open up tricky conversations, or just have a fun night of in-depth discussion of personal topics. I realized that the BioGraffs method creates the a structure that encourages active listening and the space for couples to really hear each other, expound on their perspective, and communicate better. I also saw how it could be a useful tool for therapists to share with their clients. I sought input from psychotherapists, psychologists, and counselors on how to make this tool work for people in clinical settings. In 2022, I teamed up with ACT therapist Joey Salvatore and Dr. Miranda Morris, a psychologist, and together we are working to make this valuable tool more widely available to people, including through therapists, counselors, coaches, and educators.
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Can I get help using this tool?BioGraffs is a powerful tool to use on your own, but I also offer coaching to get more out of your BioGraffs experience.
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What happens during a coaching session?Before our coaching session, I'll send you a questionnaire to help me get a sense of your relationship dynamics and what you hope to achieve together. You'll also receive your BioGraffs kit in the mail—everything you need to begin building meaningful conversations. During our virtual session, I’ll guide you step-by-step through creating your first BioGraffs, using prompts carefully crafted to reflect your unique goals and experiences. We’ll explore the stories your BioGraffs reveal, helping you and your partner share your perspectives in a new way. Through this process, you'll practice active listening—fostering deeper understanding and connection. As you become more comfortable with the method, you’ll discover how these skills can carry over into everyday conversations, even beyond using the cubes. Together, we’ll also develop personalized prompts for you to continue working with on your own, so the insights and growth don’t stop when the session ends. My goal is to help you build communication tools that empower you long after our time together.
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Is this coaching right for me and my partner?The BioGraff method with coaching is a good fit for couples who: ✔ want to be proactive around communication, problem areas, and intimacy. ✔ want to move forward but find it hard to make time and space in their busy lives to talk. ✔ have very different communication styles, but are committed to understanding each other. Coaching with Jen and the BioGraffs method is not a good fit for: ✗ couples with years of built-up hurts, disconnection, and resentments (more intensive therapy with a licensed couples therapist is a better fit for you). ✗ couples where only one partner wants to do this (this method require active participation). ✗ relationships involving significant breaches of trust, addiction, abuse, or relational trauma (again, more intensive therapy with a licensed couples therapist is a better fit for you).
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Is this therapy?BioGraffs is a coaching program and a method. It is not psychotherapy and is not intended to treat any mental health or mental condition. That said, it can be a powerful tool for the treatment of mental illness in the hands of a skilled clinician. I am not a licensed therapist, and the coaching I provide is not a substitute for couples therapy. The BioGraffs method is designed to guide you through a communication process, but its success depends on your commitment to actively engage and apply the tools provided. While I will help you navigate the method and provide support, the responsibility to do the work lies with you and your partner. Like any relationship tool, results will vary from couple to couple, and no specific outcomes are guaranteed. After our sessions together, you will be set up to continue to use the BioGraffs method for continued growth in your communication with each other.
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Are you a therapist?I am not a therapist, I'm a coach. I've been doing workshops and individual sessions with people using this method for several years. I've also shared it with many couples and sex therapists who are using it with their own clients to talk about sex and other relationship topics. I developed this method as a way to help people talk about difficult topic. It started actually as an interactive art installation where I invited people to make BioGraffs of their preferred sexual flow. It was meant to get people talking about something that many people find difficult to talk about. People made BioGraffs and shared them with their partner as a fun and non-threatening way to say, "hey, let's talk about sex and what I like." It proved immensely successful. I soon realize that everything that made this a great way to talk about sex, also made it a great way to talk about almost anything that might be a little hard to talk about.
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Is coaching confidential?Yes, all coaching sessions are completely confidential. I take your privacy very seriously and provide a safe, non-judgmental space for you and your partner to explore your communication challenges.
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Can we use BioGraffs on our own after a coaching session?Absolutely! That's the whole point. The BioGraffs kit is designed to be used regularly. The more you use it, the more you will learn to say through this method. After our sessions, you’ll have the knowledge and tools to continue using the method for regular check-ins, date nights, or when difficult topics arise. It’s a method you can come back to again and again, even when you just want to have fun being creative and talking.
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Tell me more about how you came up with this idea?I'm Jen Beman, and I invented BioGraffs based on a philosophy of storytelling I developed through my career as a documentary editor. I've spent 30 years understanding storytelling, and the different ways stories can unfold based on different perspectives in a documentary. Talking about Sex In 2016 I started a monthly women's discussion group because I was interested in helping women share their stories about their relationships and their sexual experiences. I thought I might make a documentary about it. I invented an activity for that group that involved using cubes to stand for sexual values. It was so successful in my discussion group that I turned it into an interactive art installation called the Graphic Sex Project to help people tell their sexual stories, de-shame talking about sex, and open up new conversations about preferences. At multiple events across the country, I asked people to make a "graph" of a good sexual experience using colored cubes. The installations were a huge success. People could make a graph, or just browse the collection of graphs other people had made at previous installations. It was a featured event around the DC areas, as well as at several Sex Weeks events at Universities across the country. What I discovered doing these installations was that this quirky way of looking at sexuality was a uniquely powerful way for a person to get a new perspective on their desires, and the graphs they created were a great conversation opener with a partner, sparking deep discussion on a typically difficult topic. BioGraffs is Born I soon realized that this was actually a very helpful way to think about any difficult topic. That couples could benefit from using this tool to open up tricky conversations, or just have a fun night of in-depth discussion of personal topics. I realized that the BioGraffs method creates the a structure that encourages active listening and the space for couples to really hear each other, expound on their perspective, and communicate better. I also saw how it could be a useful tool for therapists to share with their clients. I sought input from psychotherapists, psychologists, and counselors on how to make this tool work for people in clinical settings. In 2022, I teamed up with ACT therapist Joey Salvatore and Dr. Miranda Morris, a psychologist, and together we are working to make this valuable tool more widely available to people, including through therapists, counselors, coaches, and educators.
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Do you offer training for therapists and coaches?Yes! I offer one on one sessions and can also arrange in-person or virtual training for your practice's team members. Contact me for more details.
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What if we can’t finish all three sessions within the package duration?You can cancel your session up to 24 hours in advance, and either re-book or request a refund of a pro rata amount. The cost of the BioGraffs Mag Plus is $110 and is not refundable.
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Do I have to book all the days and time for the Clear Communication package now?You can book your first session directly through the "Book Now" button on my website. Once you purchase a package, you’ll be able to schedule all three sessions at times that work for you.